“There was a problem with his tushie.” (in reference to Elvis)
“Dirty words, Dirty Songs and OMG”
“Who was having sex with whom and at what angle?”
My students are trying to kill me. That’s what I tell my wife. She says, ‘I hope they succeeed.’ — Tom Sweeney, aka the best math professor ever (via r0nniethebear)
why would you put out a cigarette in your friend’s armpit?
I get so upset sometimes and I always forget why I’m upset. — A friend
it’s not even a girly movie.. it’s from the 60’s. — a friend in reference to the breakfast club
A friend just walked into my room wearing a leopard print snuggie, goggles and a cowboy hat, proceeded to run, tripped and ended up doing the most awkwardly hilarious dance I have ever witnessed.
my life is sage
one of my friends just opened my door, walked in wearing a blanket, started making noises and walked out
another friend then peeked in, smiled and shut my door
what is my life